Top Ten Lifeguard Pet Peeves
- Fat guys who say, "Lotion me" (from Jones Beach, Michael Gaudi)
- People who assume just because you're wearing a bathing suit you know how to swim (from Field 2 Beach, Julie Hahn)
- Looks from commuters when you get on subway in trunks and a whistle (from Manasquan Beach, Dave Jordan)
- Guys who pretend to be drowning because they enjoy the mouth-to-mouth (from Seven Presidents Ocean Front Park Beach, Michelle Kantor)
- Guys who pretend to be drowning because they enjoy the mouth-to-mouth (from Central Mall Beach, Bob Lenti)
- Constantly having to remind Letterman it ain't a nude beach (from Field 4 beach, Steve DeCastro)
- If you let someone drown, they make you work weekends (from Robert Moses Beach, Ino Puig)
- Narrow-minded lifeguards who just can't accept your relationship with the CPR dummy (from Bradley Beach, Stephen Fowler)
- When you get right down to it, not many people really look good in a bathing suit (from Zach's Bay Beach, Tara Wilson)
- A depressed, overweight David Hasselhoff keeps asking for a job (from Long Branch Beach, Curtis Fox)
Number 5 reminds me of Andrew and I threatening to get naked at Louise and Shae's going away party. I think Louise would have killed us if we did, but the resulting look on her face might have been worth it. ;)