February 26th, 2001

Ceci n'est pas une personne.

I woke up in a Jane Siberry mood...

When I was sitting in Tahoe, playing black jack, this girl sat next to me, and as we're sitting there drinking our free drinks, and hoping for 21 again and a again, we started talking. Somehow the topic turned to love. Listening to Jane Siberry this morning, I heard Love Is Everything and it reminded me of her, and our discussion...

Love Is Everything

maybe it was to learn how to love
maybe it was to learn how to leave
maybe it was for the games we played
maybe it was to learn how to choose
maybe it was to learn how to lose
maybe it was for the love we made

love is everything they said it would be
love made sweet and sad the same
but love forgot to make me too blind to see
you're chickening out aren't you?
you're bangin' on the beach like an old tin drum
I cant wait 'til you make
the whole kingdom come
so I'm leaving

maybe it was to learn how to fight
maybe it was for the lesson in pride
maybe it was the cowboys' ways
maybe it was to learn not to lie
maybe it was to learn how to cry
maybe it was for the love we made

love is everything they said it would be
love did not hold back the reins
but love forgot to make me too blind to see
you're chickening out aren't you?
you're bangin' on the beach like an old tin drum
I cant wait 'til you make
the whole kingdom come
so I'm leaving

first he turns to you
then he turns to her
so you try to hurt him back
but it breaks your body down
so you try to love bigger
bigger still
but it...it's too late

so take a lesson from the strangeness you feel
and know you'll never be the same
and find it in your heart to kneel down and say
I gave my love didn't I?
and I gave it big...sometimes
and I gave it in my own sweet time
I'm just leaving

love is everything...

I always meet the most interesting people at Casino's and on ski lifts. I love going to Tahoe for that reason.

Anyway... I wish I had gotten her number. Then again, that was the perfect momment, would have trying to stretch the momment out by calling her ruined the momment? Perhaps... I'm usually quiet, because I'm often in awe at the perfectness of my friends and what is going on around me, like walking out to a quiet lake and seeing deer and swan's, and if you say or do anything, the momment will be ruined. I hate ruining momments, and I'm often content to watch and see where they go.
Ceci n'est pas une personne.

In honor of the Alaskans that have moved away...

We should go do the Urban Iditarod. We go "borrow" a shopping cart. Decorate it. Get into costume, and run the three miles (even I can do that. Especially since we stop at 5 bar's along the way. Gotta replentish those fluid's you know).

I'm thinking Amber in a furry bikini and a fur parka hat (not the parka, just the hat) and my 12" bull whip mushing us "dogs" along. :-)

We can send pictures to our Alaskan friends letting 'em know we miss 'em, and they they aren't the only ones who can mush...
  • Current Music
    Rhyme Of The Ancient Mariner by Iron Maiden
Ceci n'est pas une personne.

Mardi Gras!!!

Let's go earn those beads, people! Mardi Gras on Post St. in San Jose is always a wild time.

If you wanna ride with us, we leave from my place at 5:30.
  • Current Music
    Always The Sun by The Stranglers
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How to liven your journal...

I was discussing with a friend our various journals, and she was complaining that her journal entries were depressing. So I am going to share the sagely wisdom that I shared with her, with you also.

Have you been to or watched a comedy show? Have you ever really listened to what the comedians are saying? Generally it's very depressing subject matters. Marital and family problems. Drinking problems. Problems with the government. They are telling you life sucks, and you are laughing your ass off, and thanking them for it. Don't blame the two drink minimum. There is no way you got that drunk off the watered down drinks at the comedy clubs.

I can help you make people laugh when telling them that you ran over their cat, and then served it to them as a pot roast. It's fun, it's easy, and you can do it also. Making them laugh, and running over cats.

To key tools at your disposal:

  • Exageration
  • Sarcasm (with a "C", not a "K". We are NOT going there again.)

First is the easiest one, exageration. Embellish madly, so it is obvious you are exagerating. If someone is going out of their way to make you miserable, don't just call them "coniving bastards", in stead, try this:

Those prehensile weasels, sitting in their hourly rate hotel room's, masturbating to 25 watt bulbs and thoughts of dragging me naked through broken glass, rolling me in salt and flower, and then frying my up and serving me like a kipper.

See the difference?

You did not have to "walk home", you had to "hike 40 miles through white out blizzard conditions, needing to kill a woolly mammouth on the way to stay warm. And that was a good day."

Now you try it... It's not, "My Mother called to bitch me out about my life style," it's, "My mother, being the sadistic person she is, called at 5:30am on Saturday, to tell me that my Grand Mother rolled over in her grave to call my mother, to tell her that my use of the phrase Unga Bunga is totally inappropriate, and that my father wants to write me out of the will, I will never make more than $4.35/hr with my attitude, and that Dracula was a more warm and loving son than me."

And the annoying people in your life, are not "stupid fools", but "purile wastes of human flesh, devoid of any sentiant thought, other than what it requires to annoy me. In this case, just opening their mouths, and letting loose an oral fart, which not only stinks up my air space, but also leads me to think of how much nicer the world would be if we actually did have a world war three. Alone, in my bomb shelter, not listening to the daily whines of moans of lower class apes with inflated egos."

Now on to sarcasm. This is a bit tougher. You need to say one thing, but mean the oposite, and have your audience pick up on this. There are a couple methods of doing this, stressing a word or sylable, or playing with phonetics.

Let's say you got dragged to an N'Sync concert. As soon as your brain stops reeling, and your ears stop bleeding, you want to describe that the horror that is pre-teen musical taste. You could say, "I went, and it sucked," or even, "I went, I hate kids, and it sucked giant donkey dong." But those would not be taking advantage of the laugh factor of sarcasm. You might better phrase it like this, "I was dragged to this 'lovely' venue for 'pleasant' 'musical' event. Surrounded by the most 'intilectional' in-duh-viduals ever amassed, I felt the 'up lifting joy' of teen-pop at it's 'best'." Sometimes your audience might be in-duh-viduals themselves, and you might then close with, "It suck giant donkey dong."

Hopefully this will help you turn your journal from being depressing to being funny, without losing your 'important message'. ;)
  • Current Music
    Smut by Foetus Inc
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Devil Music

I found this today...

Diabolus In Music

Diabolus in musica was a medival term for the tritone (augmented fourth and diminished fifth). It divides the octave into equal parts (in this case C and F sharp). In the medieval system of church modes, the tritone was most conspicuous as the interval between the final and fourth degree of the modes F, the Lydian and Hypolydian.

The first mention of the word "tritonus" seems to be in the 9th or 10th century organum treatise "Musica Enchiriads", though it was not explicitly prohibited until the development of Guido of Arezzo's hexachordal system. From then until the end of the Renaissance, the tritone - nicknamed Diabolus in Music - was regarded as a dangerous interval associated with evil, and was banned by the church as being thought to summon Satan.

Those found using the cord were routinely subjected to slow torturous death be genital mutilation and administering of such implements as the skullcrusher, the breast breaker, and the wheel. Burnings at the stake were also favored.

I'm guessing, in evilness, the modern equivalent are Britney Spears, N*Sync, and Back Street Boys.