I do not know how to deal with grief. Not my own, and even less, with others.
In retrospect I can see the fuck up on my part.
Our friend Willow died, Emily called me to tell me and I said I was sorry and then proceeded to tell her about my day.
I'm very much saddenned by Willows death. Cancer took her far before her time. But I deal with grief by not dealing with it. I distract myself and keep myself busy doing other things and thinking about other things so I do feel depressed. I've been depressed, it is very, very, very hard to become undepressed. Now I dance around things that will depress me and fight to keep the positive frame of mind that I have.
And often, when people are depressed, I try to change the subject to happier things.
Unfortunately Emily took my avoidance of the subject as me not caring about Willows death or about her grief.
So, any suggestions on better ways to deal with grief, that helps me keep a stable frame of mind and also allows me to console other people without looking like an ass?