Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
Tip #1: How to tell when you are dead.
- Little things start bothering you: little things like worms, bugs,
- Something is missing in your personal relationships.
- Your dog becomes overly affectionate.
- You have a hard time getting a waiter.
- Exotic birds flock around you.
- People ignore you at parties.
- You have a hard time getting up in the morning.
- You no longer get off on cocaine.
Damn, I must be almost dead, as I have all those symptoms except 5 and 8!