A Quark of A Different Spin. (adameros) wrote,
A Quark of A Different Spin.
adameros

bloodycarrot`s News Items (FICTION)

In The News...



THE POPE today addressed pilgrims in Rome and reiterated his belief that women should not be allowed into the priesthood, saying that femininity has no place in the Catholic Church. This coming from a man wearing a long white gown with matching hat and accesories...



JOE NEGWORTHY of Vancouver, British Columbia (Canada) was charged yesterday with drunk driving, but a breathalizer test proved he was sober. "I never drive my car when I`m drunk," he insisted, adding "I have a powerboat for that."...



MRS. MAVIS O`SHAUGNESSY has given birth to quintuplets in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan (Canada). Doctors report that the mother and her five babies are doing great, fine, pretty good, fine, average, not bad and so-so...



THE FLAT EARTH SOCIETY of New York State will hold its annual picnic and horizon-scoffing contest next Sunday. It will be held near the North edge...



APOLOGY







The above photograph appeared in yesterday`s edition over the caption "FOX News Executive Fired." We apologize for this unfortunate error and regret any confusion or embarrassement that may have been caused. The caption should have read "FOX News Executive Promoted."



SPORTS ROUNDUP



Last night`s results in the NHL: 2,6,7,14,28,19 bonus number 18







LOTTERY RESULTS: insert your own numbers







Note to myself: Buy milk and cookies at store today...
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